The Third Women’s & Motorcycling National Conference

by Patty Gwozdz

One fine, warm and sunny JU-lie mornin', the gang from Spokes-Women MC left their stakes in New Jersey. Headin' out to the Mason-Dixon Line and the good ol' state of West Virgin-I-A, the gals were in their saddles ridin' steady and straight to that mighty fine round-up, "The Third Women's & Motorcycling National Conference."

This here partner, "Pokey Pat," and her side-kick "Burnsy," met up with trail boss "Speedy Sisto," along with the north and south riders, to partake in some mighty fine grub at that chow wagon, "The Cracker Barrel." The eaten's was good, but that's where we got wind of the trouble, "Zesty Zimmerman" and "Smitty," was havin' with Smitty's mode of transport. I believe hearin' that there tale is better left to them two. So I'll just keep-a tellin' this un.

The road we was a-travelin' took us through some mighty pretty scene-ry in Pennsylvania, Maryland and then West Virgin-I-A. You should have seen them there ladies a-ridin' up, down and about them roads all in unison. Pretty as
that song Jimmy Crack Corn sung in harmony. Well, before the sun-set, we fine-ly did get to our camp site at the Comfort Inn. It was there we was to lay our tired ol' bones down and bunk for the rest of our stay.

This here story can go on and on like a rat-ler's tail, so I'll just be a tellin' the high points from what I can RE-call, and that ain't much since I here spent a good deal of time thinkin' bout food and gettin' from our bunk house on down the road to where the Women's round-up was, so we could chow down. Which if any of you know me by now, is high on my list of pre-a-tees. Well, hell, they had so many different kinds of grub at that there dinin' hall, I knowd I had two dee-serts every single day which was way too many!

But you could eat just as much as you wanted too! That was a-hard un' to pass up. Well, I member one night we mosied on over to another chuck wagon called the Sizzlin' or somethin near that name. They too had all you could eat at that there salad bar. Then, another night, we went to this real fancy I-talian place. Why their stuffed shells was so good, I almost done went plumb loco eatin' and all! Then, one of my most favorite treks was to the Winery! They had a lot of different tastin' wines, and I found the cheese that went with the drinkin,' cause that's what I was a-lookin' for anyway.

Well that there is what I member bout our trip. Oh yeah, one more thing, we stopped on the way back home and had meat loaf at the same waterin' hole as when we was a goin'. Now that I can think a spell on it, there was a great swimmin' hole at our bunk house, and that there par-rade was mighty swell in Buckhannon. But the best part of our journey was a-spendin time with buckeroos like Speedy Sisto, Fearless Janie, Zesty Zim, Smitty, Lil' Linda, Casino Kate, Brownie, Honda Annie, Roamin' Romias and Tam Terrific. The other gals was nice too! But ain't it the truth, God didn't put no finer ladies on this hear earth then those ladies of the Spokes-Woman Gang! The End.

PS They sure in hell had a lot of Wal-Marts down there, and I'm a-thinkin I stopped at them all!